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Roonie the rabbit

A character in 381 comics.

This friend is very sweet, but a little distracted. They’d do anything for you, if they actually understood what you wanted them to do, which they don’t.

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Short

Oct 30, 2023

SQUIRREL: The days are getting so short.
RABBIT: But that just means the sunsets come sooner!
The squirrel sighs.
SQUIRREL: Can't you just let me complain in peace?

Hands

Oct 27, 2023

RABBIT (thinking): On the one hand, I could do laundry.
RABBIT (thinking): On the other hand, I could wash dishes.
The rabbit grabs a muffin.
RABBIT (thinking): A compelling third hand offers a delicious muffin and wins the day.

Risks

Oct 23, 2023

A rabbit and fox are skydiving. RABBIT: You inspire me to take risks! Thank you! FOX: Ha! You're welcome!
The fox looks at the rabbit.
The fox looks at the approaching ground.
FOX (thinking): At some point, I'll mention I forgot to pack parachutes, but I hate to ruin such a nice moment.

Rebirth

Oct 20, 2023

SQUIRREL: Fall trees do not die. Instead, a second act starts, and they are reborn.
MARK THE TREE: THAT'S RIGHT! Old Mark is no more! I am new Mark now! STACY: Ooo.
grace:%20You%20seem%20PRETTY%20similar,%20Mark.%20MARK%3A%20Well,%20I'm%20NOT!%20I'm%20into%20LOADS%20of%20new%20stuff%20now!%20STACY%3A%20Ooo!%20Like%20what?
mark:%20NEW%20Mark%20is%20considering%20wearing%20HATS%20again!%20STACY%3A%20OOO!!%20GRACE%3A%20Mark!%20NO!%20Let's%20NOT%20replace%20your%20fedora%20year.

Here For Me

Oct 18, 2023

To view this content, you must be a member of Porter Mason's Patreon at $5 or more

Soothing

Oct 16, 2023

LIZARD: How do you soothe yourself when you're nervous? RABBIT: I'm never nervous, so I dunno! I guess I would eat?
LIZARD: But you're ALWAYS eating. So... maybe... DEEP-DOWN... you're ALWAYS nervous. So you constantly soothe yourself to avoid your constant anxiety.
The rabbit stares at the lizard.
RABBIT: I'd like to move on to another topic.

Hugs

Oct 13, 2023

LIZARD: I'm feeling a little anxious. RABBIT: Wait... Do you need SNUGGLES?!
The rabbit leaps towards the lizard with his entire body, without the lizard noticing. LIZARD: Um... No, I don't think-
Aggressive HUG from the rabbit!
RABBIT: I'm sorry, I shouldn't have phrased that as a question.

Deep

Oct 11, 2023

To view this content, you must be a member of Porter Mason's Patreon at $5 or more

Choose

Oct 9, 2023

RABBIT: You can either love me or keep pushing me away. What do you choose?
SQUIRREL: I love you.
The squirrel pushes the rabbit off a tree with an unprovoked SHOVE.
SQUIRREL: I choose the middle path!

With You By My Side

Oct 6, 2023

LIZARD (thinking): With you by my side, I feel like I can do anything.
LIZARD (thinking): But I don't. Because I am terrified of disappointing you.
LIZARD (thinking): So I can't do anything.
LIZARD (thinking): With you by my side.

Facing Reality

Oct 2, 2023

SQUIRREL (in verse): Fall trees shed their leaves, And they face reality, Brave and unburdened.
ANN THE TREE: (sigh) Kevin, I'm 45 years old. It's time to get real. I will NEVER be a child prodigy.
KEVIN THE TREE: A prodigy at what, Ann? ANN THE TREE: I don't know. I never had talent or committed or practiced or actually focused on anything.
KEVIN THE TREE: Well, you know... it's all politics. ANN THE TREE: Yes! Yes it is. THANK you, Kevin! THANK you!

Possibilities

Sep 27, 2023

To view this content, you must be a member of Porter Mason's Patreon at $5 or more

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