Latest Comics | Page 34 | Roonie the Rabbit

You’ll Never Amount to Anything

FLYNN: If you keep this up, you'll never amount to anything.

A pause.

ROONIE: Sounds like a plan.

Rock

FLYNN: I don't like my life. And I am angry. But I have nothing to be angry at.
FLYNN: So I'll just kick this rock.

SQUIRREL (thinking, as they repeatedly kick rocks): Ow... Ow... Ow...

FLYNN: Well...

FLYNN: It's not NOT helping.

Possibilities

HOT CHOCOLATE: I like to think through all the possibilities before I do anything.

HOT CHOCOLATE: It takes a lot of time and a lot of effort. But in the end, it's important.

HOT CHOCOLATE: Because it keeps me from doing anything.

HOT CHOCOLATE: And that's my real goal.

Bother

FLYNN: No one better bother me today,

SOUND: Unprovoked SHOVE

FLYNN: Better safe than sorry.

Ready

FLYNN: The moon looks READY tonight. Shining. Bright. Full of life.

THE MOON: That's right, baby!! I'm ready to HANG OUT. LET'S GOOOOO, FOLKS!!

THE MOON: WAIT, is everyone ASLEEP again?! Come ON, people! (sigh)...

THE MOON: WHATEVER, it's FINE... But these jerks will be all "up-and-at-'em" when the stupid SUN comes up, you can count on THAT...

Honestly

CHRIS: And he goes for the "candy bar" again. HONESTLY, Jacob... What do they got that I haven't got?
JACOB: HONESTLY, Chris?

JACOB: I mean... They have crispy delicious cookies delicately topped with ribbons of tender caramel, all wrapped up in a this layer of exquisite chocolate.

CHRIS: Oh SURE, if THAT'S what you're looking for...

CHRIS: But doesn't anyone value POTASSIUM anymore?!
STEPHEN: Hear hear!
JACOB: Shut up, Stephen.

Waves

HOT CHOCOLATE: Anxiety comes in waves.

THE OCEAN: I'm having a BIG PARTY, wanna come!?
HOT CHOCOLATE: U-um, well...

THE OCEAN: C'MON!! It'll be FUN!! EVERYONE will be there!!
HOT CHOCOLATE: I-I- (gurgle) OK! OK!

THE OCEAN: GREAT!! It's also a costume PARTY.
HOT CHOCOLATE: What!? (blurble) N-no@
THE OCEAN: Ooo, and can you give a TOAST!?!

Late!

ROONIE: I lost track of time while snacking.
ROONIE: Now I'm really late.

ROONIE: But I forget what for.

A pause.

ROONIE: Ooo, maybe it's more food!

Disputing

PITTMAN: I'm the BEST at doing this.

FLYNN: Yes, fine. No one is disputing that.

PITTMAN: (sigh) I know...

PITTMAN: I wish they WOULD...

Morning

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Progress

BIRD (thinking): Well, I've made a lot of progress as an artist this year.

BIRD (thinking): I've been boring, derivative, lazy, and pandering.

BIRD (thinking): But in lots of new and interesting ways.

Last Spoonful

ROONIE: I want this last spoonful.

ROONIE: But I offer it to my friend.
ROONIE: Because I love them.

FLYNN: Ew... no.

ROONIE: And because I knew they didn't want it anyway.